Tag Archives: working out

werking out

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I got 99 problems and hopefully all the fat related ones will start shrinking now that I’ve bit the bullet and joined Cross Fit. Yay ME! (feel free to say that in a very sarcastic tone)

What!? You scream in disbelief. Girl, you crazy. I hear you thinking. Yes my friends, I have truly lost my ever loving marbles. I just had my first class tonight and I am very happy to say I survived. It was a bit less traumatic than that time I started Insanity but then again I didn’t have a room full of cross fitters staring at me doing Insanity either.

I’m not going to lie and say it was fun or easy or awesome or anything remotely pleasant because lets be real here people – who likes working out? Ok, besides all the people who were just in that Cross Fit class I was in, who all appeared to oddly enough reallllly like working out. Though to be fair, I probably appeared to be having a grand time with that stupefied shit eating grin I was sporting the entire time. What other facial expression should you have in a room full of strangers that your squatting in front of?

So I’m starting small. If I can finish his week I will feel so proud of myself. Then I may aim for a month r something. Hopefully my interest won’t sputter out like with everything else exercise related. Maybe I will get to post one of those before after pictures in like a month when I get all jacked. How cool would that be. While surfing for a cool cross fit photo to use on this blog post I found a pregnant woman squatting and I promise you even she was more fit and capable than I am.

Lets review some reasons I despise working out:

  1. um, its hard duh
  2. afterward I not only look, but also feel like Jello
  3. it forces me to wash my hair more often, so lame
  4. rigormortis sets in for a few days
  5. takes up like all my tv time
  6. makes me hungrier, kinda defeating the purpose here
  7. makes me sleep like a dead person, hopefully we don’t have a fire tonight
  8. makes me sweaty which is unbecoming
  9. sometimes I pee my pants doing jumping jacks, I wish I were kidding
  10. takes me away from my family duties, oh ha that one goes on the pro side

The good news is they didn’t ask me what my goals were! I was terrified they were going to ask me what my goals were and luckily I didn’t have to make something up on the spot. I do need to think that one through though because if history is any indication of what kind of stupid shit will fly out of my mouth on the spot…. yikes, I don’t want to have to quit before I even technically join.

Oh and that post picture, sorry but really how could I not? Now nude cross fit would put a whole new spin on things. I would totally watch that. Could be dangerous though for men…

insanity

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It’s been a rough couple of years child bearing and rearing so I haven’t had the time (uh, energy, emotional or physical wherewithal or just flat out motivation) to step foot in a gym (or go downstairs and workout in my home gym). Excuses range from why would I get in shape when I am just going to wreck my body getting pregnant again? To the actual fact that O cries hysterically every time I even mention going to the gym.

Recently however, I have seen all these transformation posts on Instagram and I’ve decided it’s time to get my pancake butt in gear. So I joined this 21 day fitness challenge group and it’s pretty awesome. We have to report to the group on our workouts so it makes us somewhat accountable, we have to do meal planning and we are all doing the same dvd workout series together so we are all suffering equally. The workout series we’ve been directed to follow is called Insanity and it’s literally named that because you have to be some sort of insane freak of nature to keep up with the people in these videos. It’s a total whirlwind of throwing your body around and jumping and squatting and running and all this other crap that seems easy but at 100mph for the full 45 minutes it’s straight insane. Ahhhhhh-haaaaa. Today’s my fourth day and I am so proud of myself. Although I do it alone now because C was laughing so hard at me during the first video it was a distraction. He said I wasn’t doing anything they were doing. It doesn’t matter though because whatever I was doing was killing me too. During the workouts all I hear is the thumping of my own heart in my ears and I don’t see anything because my eyes are usually closed and I pant harder than an old dog tied to a tree on a hot summer day. But whatever. I am really trying to get looking pre-baby before Memorial Day and at this rate it just might happen. And that is totally insane.