real men endure torture of all degrees.
Tag Archives: girls
real men series 3
real men actively participate in child rearing, for example taking their young childrens to gymnastics. I know what your thinking but it still counts even if the leotard is installed backwards and the poor child has a perma wedgie all class.
passive aggressive
passive aggressive shit via my kids
- W yells “HAPPY BIRTHDAY” when she’s pissed. Pretty sure thats a big F. U.
- O draws crying stick figures and hearts breaking when she gets in trouble and tapes them all over the house
- W freezes people who get on her bad side with her “stuper powers” a la evil Elsa
- O regularly threatens that I will have to snuggle with the cat if I make her go to bed too early.
she looks snuggley, right? - They literally pick their toys UP OFF THE FLOOR when I tell them to clean up
- W goes through the house shutting and locking all the effing bedroom doors. She knows I hate going up and down the stairs, I am not athletic – it winds me.
- O throws anything she breaks in the trash can so she doesn’t get busted – no matter who’s stuff it is.
- W will poop on the floor if we don’t turn on the bathroom light for her, every time.
For real though. Thats a total knife. I found this picture and the story behind it is right there however I don’t read squiggle line so I don’t know what it says. I’m going to assume this is the result of something C did to make O angry – the fact that it’s in red and furiously squiggly I bet its a horror story. I’ll confirm and follow up. This is juicy – yet terrifying at the same time… to be continued
best part
me “what was the best part of your day today, W?”
W “pooping on the potty after lunch”
nice.
barbie
4 adult men watching Barbie’s a Pony Tale because of that small fry up front. Girl Boss – at the age of 2.
bling
Daddy was on daycare duty while O was at an audition a few weeks ago. He text me this adorable picture of W enjoying her new favorite place sweet frog frozen yogurt.
awww cute.
Then he text me back and says “notice anything?”
Oh god, new baby earrings!!! So adorable!! C has to do that stuff because I can’t watch. He said her eyes got all big and when they walked away she looked him square in the eye and said “They HURT me”. Sooooo sad 🙁
I was really unsure if she would keep them in or mess with them because she didn’t really ask for them like O did. But She loved them! She kept showing everybody “Look at my earrings.” She was so proud and she even twists them herself.
"I'm just a KID mom"
Every once in a while I get lucky and witness the girls playing together peacefully, cuddling or otherwise just being totally adorable. O has been teaching W songs recently (when they aren’t throwing down or scaring the shizzle out of each other). O stages W in her “acting scenes” and makes her “say her lines“. It’s adorable. She helps her sing “you are my sunshine” and has been working on ABC’s and numbers with her.
I’m not entirely sure what I witnessed O teaching W last night but it was so cute I had to spy-video it. I got it perfectly on film. I do however have a feeling it won’t be as cute if they actually use this one-liner on me anytime soon. Though I might be impressed at the methodology and thought behind it.
MDW
Went to Granite Hill MDW with a huge group this year. We call it “camping” but most all of us have travel trailers which are pretty much like driving a hotel to a campground.
Camping is so great, this years spot was so awesome too. One of the guys had booked it a year in advance! Good spots book so fast, especially for large groups. Most campgrounds consist of a million pull in spots on tiny lots, but this was around the edges of a huge field that was so perfect for the kids to play in.
The girls were in heaven able to just run around like little wild beasts. 
I am LOVING this daddy-daughter moment. Such a great pic.
Or this one, accidental capture of my baby being catapulted from the slide. I’m not sure how but she landed on her butt… and of course went back down a zillion more times. 
This is how you travel in large campgrounds, that or walk but who can walk with a herd of children? (most the kids were sitting up by me)
I don’t know about most kids, but mine usually eat better in a group. She actually ate a ham sandwich – um, awesome.
Um, there are no words. Really.
Party in the USA people, we rocked that dance party. O shut it down. Love.
Community slip-n-slide. That’s whats cool about camping too, neighbors are usually pretty social and neighborly. 
This is O on her bike. She doesn’t know how to ride, she says she is scared of it – but she does look pretty cute.
***sparklers**** I didn’t know they were even around anymore!!!
dammit
As a mother I try to avoid profanity as much as possible so in moments of utter frustration I tend to huff really loud similar to an animal giving birth.
something like: uggggghhhhhhhhhHHHHHH in various tones and pitches.
However, O just informed me “when something goes wrong, I need to yell DAMMIT really loud“.
Sounds legit.
little girls
Sugar and spice and everything nice.
W taking a picture of O (making a heart with her hands)
Sometimes they play so good and look so freaking cute I could imagine having 100 of them running around.
HAHAHHAHA. Then reality hit’s and I’m all like, THAT was the WINE talking.