someone seriously didn’t think this through, or maybe they did and the joke’s on us?
Category Archives: Parenting
real men series 4
real men endure torture of all degrees.
real men series 3
real men actively participate in child rearing, for example taking their young childrens to gymnastics. I know what your thinking but it still counts even if the leotard is installed backwards and the poor child has a perma wedgie all class.
real men series 2
real men do yoga in the wee hours of the morning, before work, wearing all white.
real men series 1
real men carry the groceries in for their ladies. all at one time. every single bag. one trip. boom. then they ruin it by saying something stupid like “make me dinner woman“. but mine doesn’t do that because for 1, he knows all I bought was junk food anyway and for 2, I don’t know how to cook so anything I made would likely make him vomit, or at least feel very ill. lucky guy.
bedtime games
Bedtime Games is one of the most serious and intense games out there for parents and children to participate in. My advice is Pregame Hard. Play with caution. Play with integrity. Play to win. And most of all, stay strong my fellow parents – stay strong to fight another day.
facetime
O just gave this to me. This is an exact replica of Me FaceTiming an erupting Volcano. As you can see there are clear signs of concernicus written all over my face during this call, but don’t you worry O assured me that though she was on site at that volcano during its eruption she was in the bushes, and the lava was going the other way. Phew. I’m even anxiety ridden in my stick figure form.
options
W said she wants to eat her breakfast at the “healthy table”
while I am absolutely certain we don’t have one of those in our house I am relatively certain she meant she wants to eat breakfast at the coffee table.
best part
me “what was the best part of your day today, W?”
W “pooping on the potty after lunch”
nice.
candy necklaces
Home made candy necklace, or bracelet. Remember candy necklaces? My kids don’t because we are sugar free. We are also grain free, hormone free, glucose free, pesticide free, vegetable free, meat free and least but not least sanity free. Just kidding. But seriously who eats holes through their food. She doesn’t eat like a normal human but more like a caterpillar.
